A Palpatine in Ep IX Theory

[unspeakablehorror]

I feel like I need to take this very special time between the first trailer release and the film's theatre release to to come up with increasingly implausible theories for what Palpatine will be up to in Ep IX.   So here's a few:

*Takes up scuba diving
*Possesses BB-8.  Is finally defeated by that small green and white robot we see in the trailer.
*permanently retired
*Just there to be the laugh track