Loftwings and Demons

Never realized before I stopped going in stores how much they are the ultimate advertising tool.  Like you see an obnoxious ad online for something you'll never use and if anything, it just makes you want to buy anything less.  You see items in a store that you go, presumably because you need or want some of the items in it, and the items are their own advertising.  Maybe they've got attractively designed packaging, or a beautiful display case.  Maybe you can try some of them out before buying them.  Maybe they've got samples, the smell of food being sold wafting across the store.  They've probably got some music going. It's advertising that engages all the senses in ways that online ads can only dream of.  And it used to get me to buy a bunch of stuff I'd never use or that didn't live up to my expectations.

I just never realized how negatively that was impacting my life before.  I thought going to the store, to the mall, to the theatres made me happy.  And they did also do that, sometimes.  But I never realized how much they made me feel like I never had enough and always needed more.  Even when the more caused more problems than it solved, even when it brought me more disappointment than joy.

I enjoy the park a lot more than those trips.  The trees aren't trying to sell me anything.

I spent a lot of time being gloomy about it, but I actually really don't feel any sort of need anymore for travelling around beyond for necessary purposes and exercise.  Maybe this is temporary, but it's nice not to feel like I need to go anywhere 'special' and that where I am is good enough.  I like being able to go outside, but I feel like just walking around my neighborhood or hanging around at the park is plenty exciting for me.  Like just being in a lot of places, we get constantly advertised to in a way that's much more visceral and causes deeper longing than just seeing an ad on a screen.  But I largely don't get that anymore, because I almost never go anywhere to buy anything any more, or even go to public places that are indoors unless it's for a strictly necessary activity.  So if I can continue with that, I think I'll save a lot of money on stuff that I'd otherwise feel I need to be happy.  I wish I could have come to this realization without a worldwide pandemic.  Maybe if I lived in a different world, I could have lived my entire life like this.

This is bad for my in person socializing of course, but I've been thinking about that.  Eventually, after I acquire a plague doctor suit hazmat suit (perhaps a slight exaggeration--perhaps), I could schedule meetings with people outside when the weather is sufficiently favorable.  Maybe I'll just find other people who like being outside, because I know a lot of people dislike the lack of climate control.  I don't like being outside in really extreme weather, but it just being the normal amount of hot or cold, with possibly some drizzle is something I'm quite used to from never owning a car in a country with often spotty public transit.